By Ariel Yve, Soiree Design Group

You’ve imagined your wedding day a million times and in so many different ways. Each time, you look amazing in your couture wedding gown, all of the details are in place, and you are surrounded by your loved ones who have traveled from all over to witness your special day. But the question is, “How do you get from ‘Will you marry me?’ to ‘I do?’”  With so many details to consider and decisions to be made, where is a girl (or guy) to begin?  Having worked with brides from all over the world as well as having recently planned my own wedding, I can assure you that there is no feeling quite as satisfying than finding the perfect wedding venue.  And with an increase of amazing resorts and estate venues, today’s brides and grooms have the good fortunate of being able to select the location that truly stirs your imagination.

Beautiful private estates can be found all over the world at every price point, in every conceivable architectural style. With complete exclusivity and fewer restrictions, estates offer couples nearly limitless opportunities to create their dream day. As with everything in life, there are definitely challenges that come with the freedom of choosing a private estate, but the rewards (and bragging rights) can far outweigh any of the possible challenges.  Here are a few tips to help you evaluate your options when planning an estate wedding.

An estate wedding will keep your guests surprised. “There is a wonderful sense of anticipation as it’s a space that they have likely never seen, and there is a fantastic opportunity for discovery. Because you are in a space that is unique to you, your wedding will always feel original, never reminiscent of another wedding. In addition, the residential environment feels more intimate than most other types of venues... as though you were hosting in your own home.”
       – Kristin Banta, Kristin Banta Events

“Estates are wonderful because they lend themselves to that personal “fantasy” experience that most brides have had since they were little girls…it is the fulfillment of the ‘princess in them.’”
        – Paul Bott

First, turn to magazines and the internet to help you identify the style and feeling of your dream location as well as the region that you wish to get married. Being that most private estates are “private,” you may not find them through advertising, but by doing the research to identify what you are looking for; this will provide you the needed information to proceed.

Your next possible step forward is to hire a location scout. Location scouts generally represent a number of properties and can be invaluable in helping you find an estate that suits your vision and needs.  They will work as a liaison between you and the property owners, ensuring that the process of searching for and booking your ideal location runs as smoothly as possible. 

Another great option is to contact a wedding coordinator who is well-connected and respected in your desired wedding region. Coordinators are often contacted by property managers of brand new venues and estates, so they can be extremely instrumental in helping you find your dream location before anyone else even knows about it.

 And a third option is to contact the local Chamber of Commerce, or Realtor Association to find out any possible unlisted venues that may suite your needs.

      Planning an estate wedding is a totally different experience than planning a wedding at an “on-premise venue” such as hotels, country clubs, etc.  Here are some elements for you to consider when comparing your options in having an estate wedding. 

“Estate weddings offer the maximum opportunity for privacy and aesthetic customization. You have the unique opportunity to hand-select each-and-every item in order to tailor-select to your specific taste and your design plan.” 
      –Kristin Banta, Kristin Banta Events

One of the many benefits to an estate is the “setup time; because the fees for an estate can be higher, you usually have two full days to access the property for setup. This allows for more options with respects to the overall production, and design components. Many hotels and clubs only allow a few hours for setup, unless you pay the extra fee for a buyout of the space.”
      –Kristin Banta, Kristin Banta Events

You will be the only bride having her wedding at the estate on your wedding day, so there will be no chance of you crossing paths with another bride.  There is nothing worse than seeing another bride on your day, thinking that she looks better in her wedding ensemble than you do. Since estates are exclusive, you and your fiancé will feel like the king and queen of the universe on your wedding day.
     Estates are custom built and designed properties which are lovingly maintained over the years to retain an incredible sense of charm and uniqueness. Since estates are generally very impressive and carefully designed, “many décor elements are already included. Your décor and floral budget can be stretched a lot further as a result.”
      – Jeannie Ward of Wedding Jeannie

Beautiful gardens and stunning architectural features abound at private estates, making for unbelievable photo ops at every turn. As with most off-premise venues, you have the “opportunity to bring in your own caterer and customize your menus to suit your taste and any possible dietary needs.”
      – Jeannie Ward of Wedding Jeannie

No high food and beverage minimums.  Most on-premise locations impose high food and beverage minimums for premium time slots, in order to meet sales quotas.  If you have a low guest count, you won’t be forced to serve an excessive amount of food just to meet the minimum.  If you’d prefer to just serve three courses rather than five, the rest of your funds that would otherwise be spent on meeting a food and beverage quota, could be redirected toward hiring an amazing live band, world-class photographer, or to upgrade your centerpieces to include the peonies that you’ve always dreamed of having.

When you use an off-premise caterer, you can bring your own wine and alcohol, enabling you to select your very favorites at wholesale costs, plus, any unopened bottles can be returned after the wedding for a full refund. 

Parking is often an issue with estate weddings.  Most homes aren’t built with enough parking for a hundred plus cars, so you will have to factor in the cost of hiring a valet service, or shuttle service to transport your guests to-and-from a remote lot.  Some venues located in neighborhoods do have street parking available, however since your wedding will create a tremendous influx of vehicles, you should check with the city to see if parking permits are required.

“The biggest negative with respect to an estate wedding is the cost because you have to bring in everything often including restrooms… a field kitchen for catering, not to mention tables, chairs, glassware, flatware, china, dance floor, etc.” 
      –Kristin Banta, Kristin Banta Events

According to Jeannie Ward of Wedding Jeannie, “insurance certificates may be required of every vendor. Smaller companies may not be able to acquire a policy.”  Additionally, you will likely be required to secure a General Liability Policy in the amount of $1,000,000+ for the wedding day.  This can cost anywhere from $300-$1000+, depending on the specifics of your event.  For more information visit wedsafe.com or contact your local insurance agent.

Most estate rental fees only cover use of the grounds, not indoor spaces.  Be sure to keep a reserve of funds to cover the cost of renting a tent in the event of inclement weather.  When it comes to estate weddings, you always need to have a plan “A,” “B,” and “C.” Estates often have “difficult load-in docks for caterer, entertainers and floral designers. This is not always true, but often is.”
      – Jeannie Ward of Wedding Jeannie

Electrical outlets may be scarce if not totally unavailable.  “Some vendors may need to bring in generators. Be sure to ask those questions on your walkthrough, or have your vendors visit the venue to ensure all their requirements are met.”
      – Jeannie Ward of Wedding Jeannie

Lastly, one very important yet often overlooked issue is that an estate is usually a residence, and residences are often sold.  At any point in the planning process, there is the possibility of the estate being put on the market and sold before your wedding date. Talk to the owner before you put your deposit down to find out the likelihood of such a scenario. It is wise to add a clause in your contract, stipulating that if the property is sold, your signed agreement shall be incorporated into the terms of the sale, securing your investment.

When all things are said and done, the cost of estate wedding is on par with having your wedding at a high-end hotel, but the privacy and customization options available are unparalleled.

Most estates accept a very limited number of weddings and typically won’t book an event more than a year out.  Every estate’s booking policies vary so before setting your heart on a specific wedding date, you should contact your chosen venue to check availability. 

Every venue has its own unique benefits and challenges.  To better help you navigate through all of your choices and decisions, contact your wedding coordinator or location specialist to discuss the specifics of the estate(s) that you’re considering.

To be able to have a wedding at an exclusive estate is an incredible honor and privilege, so be prepared to get creative and always remember to stay flexible.